Victim?
Am I doing this to myself?
I’ve been struggling with finding an answer to my pain for weeks now. I have been sitting in the dark waiting for it to find me, instead of seeking it out. How well did that work? How did my mind ease it’s pain by waiting for yet another answer to magically make itself known? It didn’t. I waited and waited, the helpless damsel in distress. At least that’s what I thought. That’s what I let myself believe. That’s what I let others believe.
The silence screams at me as I lay in bed helpless. A victim of my own creation. My own doing. Am I a victim? Or am I attempting to live a lie? A false hope that if I label myself as a victim that someone will come to save me so that I don’t have to save myself.
I’m a damsel, yes. And I am in distress. But by no means does that mean that I am unable to save myself. I just don’t know how yet. I don’t know how to pull myself out of the void. The nothingness. To save myself will be my greatest adventure yet. But first… am I a victim?
